For the Love of French Braids and Non-Bumpit Big Bang Theory



Now, let's all be clear.  I have no real life experience with this whole lifestyle, but I am OBSESSED with Sister Wives.  Much like I am OBSESSED with Cuttlefish.  Now I like to think that somewhere a sister wife is saying, "man I'm obsessed with train wreck alcoholic vegan women who don't have any babies yet"  and blogging about someone like me. 
I will watch, read, listen to, stare, follow, stalk sister wives.  Any documentary, any podcast, any book, article, tv show, movie.  You name it, I will do that shit.

I find it just sickly fascinating.  Which, I know, makes me seem a terrible person.  But it's really that I'm in awe of their "all in" attitude.

This:



Big Love. The best scenes were always the ones with the 3 wives. And that Nikki? IDOL.

 

and this:

I don't watch reality TV as a rule, but screw you if you think I won't watch this shit.
Sister Wives on TLC? that shit is cray.

but more so this:

is what I'm fascinated with. I understand that the modesty factor is big in the Mormon faith.  I get it.  But where does this big 80's french braid hair come in?  If anyone can fill me in, please do.

I'm fairly certain it's a terrible way for a young girl to grow up and I am not making any judgements on the lifestyle or those who choose to live it.  If anything, I want to thank you for believing so hard in french braids and making that big bang theory happen without the aid of bumpits.

The hair, the dresses, the awful shoes underneath those dresses?  the 84 kids that are all related to each other kind of, who grow up and marry each other and keep the reproduction going?  That is some hardcore stuff. 

I read this:

It did a great job of showing the experience from the HUSBAND's point of view.  I quite enjoyed it.

I am very very good friends with a girl who happens to be Mormon.  Now, she and I couldn't be more different in many ways and I tease her relentlessly because I am a bitch. I tease about her magic underpants and she lets me.  She gives it back to me in other ways but my point is, she is one of my favorite people even though we are so very different.  She is one of the kindest and gentlest and most loving and non-judgemental people I've ever known. 

Let me be clear, IN NO WAY DO I THINK ALL MORMONS ARE SISTER WIVES.  So don't come after me y'all.

Because I don't know any Sister Wives in person (or do I?) I like to be really stereotypical about them. You Sister Wives out there (because I'm sure you are reading this blog), keep up the braiding and the shooting and the driving around in SUVs and the preparing for the end of days or whatever it is you do.  

I will be here with my popcorn watching/reading/following every second.  I thank you.