Thursday, January 3, 2013

Things I Love Thursday - Part 63

Most of the conversations, well, a lot of the conversations in our place since I've been pregnant and well, long before that, have started out with me saying to my dear sweet dumpster husband, "your wife is an idiot."  Then he patiently waits while I tell him why I am an idiot.  Then he either laughs with me or tells me, "yeah, that's kind of an idiot thing to do or say", or he says, "it's OK, baby" and we move on from there to the next idiotic thing I do.

This morning it was the ongoing battle with the washing of the baby bottles for the first time and then the putting them back together and OH MY GODS WHY DO THEY HAVE SO MANY GOTDAMNED PIECES?

NONSENSE!
I should have never taken them apart to begin with.  That was my real downfall.  I shoulda just sprayed them with Lysol as I said I would do and then run away cackling like a hyena at the silliness. 

So of COURSE this morning after they were all washed and laid out to dry with care, it took me approximately 25 minutes to put them all back together again.  After much swearing and Sally Boy meowyelling at me asking what my freaking problem was, after I googled how to put them together because one set was missing all the lips, after putting new lips in my AMAZON CART but thankfully not hitting "purchase" yet, something in my teeny tiny brain clicked and I found the part I was missing tucked inside another part. 

So, a happy dance of epic proportion ensued and Sally Boy was kind of enjoying it, Eliza Jane Doolittle was looking on in disgust with how stoopid I am, and all was right with the world. 

BUT IT WASN'T.  Not until I picked up the phone to tell my dear sweet dumpster husband what an idiot his wife is.

And so I did what I do.  And lately, with my voice being on the total fritz, I sound like a seal or a terrible barking dog with serious pain going on and yet, he still answers almost every time I call him to tell him my next idiotic escapade. 

Now, I am a big bonnet head and do you think that the Ingalls would have ever put up with this nonsense? NO.  EMPHATICALLY NO.  They were lucky if they had any milk to drink from bewbies or otherwise, and they didn't supplement with Charles giving a bottle of milk or any of that sissy business like we do today.  So, I am going back to that time.  I'm slamming on my bonnet, it will be fabulous of course, but bonnet it shall be and I will rock the heels under my prairie garments and not worry about the settings on the dishwasher or the washer and dryer and all these new fangled baby options with special detergent and all that NONSENSE! 

OK, so you know I'm kidding, but only slightly.  There is a saying in the rooms of AA, "KISS"  KEEP IT SIMPLE STUPID.  For me, in every area of my life, it's imperative that I KEEP IT SIMPLE.  Including babies. 


I think the more nonsense we incorporate into our lives and into our baby's lives, the more difficult things get for all of us.  So, I vow to do my best to keep them safe and in one piece, but that's the most I'm going to promise right now.  My mom dropped me on my head, and I turned out JUST FINE. 

Ya know that bargain bleach at the store that is always on sale?  Yeah, well, that's their bathwater.  DISINFECT, BABY!  KEEP IT SIMPLE, STUPID!

I've got a dresser full of clean tiny adorable ridiculous clothes, some for boys and some for girls and some for who the hell cares - baby David Bowie or someone -  but they are all these little "sacks" as DH calls them, and that's what these babies will be lucky to wear for a while.  SACK EM' UP!  But dammit they are so cute.  So so tiny and cute and sweet and smell so darn good.  And the onesies.  I cry every time I hold up the newborn white onesie that is smaller than my hand almost. 

So, as I sat again last night watching the first season of Homeland with my dear sweet dumpster husband and not ONE but BOTH of these kiddos had hiccups at the same damn time, I marveled at the fact that I can keep this simple, stupid, even though it's about the most profound thing I will ever do to grow two humans in my belly at one time. 

The Thing I Love This Thursday is that we CAN choose to reel it back in and K.I.S.S.  Really and truly, we can reel back in the crazy.  Even if we have to keep doing it over and over and over and over as I do and will have to do the rest of my life.  TOOLS to handle life on life's terms are something I never had until I started working a 12 step program.  And man oh man, are my husband and my babies the better for that whole thing. 

Sunday is eviction day, people.  Hall & Oates shall meet the world.  I will post here as soon as we are able and willing to put them out there.  I know they are excited to meet you.   Thanks so much for all the love and support!

49 comments:

  1. KISS is it. And there is no "right" way to be a parent. You will find--through the fun process of trial and error--what works best for you, everyone else aside. ENJOY the ride like you always seem to do! Congrats and I am thrilled for you and DH. Lots of love and respect xxoo

    ReplyDelete
  2. Oh, and I like the Lysol idea :)

    ReplyDelete
  3. That last part just got me all choked up & teary-eyed. I am SOOOOOOOOOOOOOO excited for you all...I can hardly stand it!

    Keep doing what you do, baby girl. You are rocking the whole thing, bonnet & all.

    But hubby & I try to remember the KISS method. And it's hard with the kiddos, but we try...face palming all the way.

    And, since every K.I.S.S. begins with Kay (wink, wink), I know you will rock it!

    I love you! *MUWAH*

    ReplyDelete
  4. Seriously...that made me get all teary and hormotional. I can't BELIEVE it's already time for you become a full-on mama. I'm so proud of you, Katy and I know you have MORE than what it takes to do this.

    Oh, and if you EVER need mama advice (or you just need a good ol bitch-fest) please do call me!!!

    MWAH!

    ReplyDelete
  5. Hall and Oats & Dumpster Husband are lucky to have you and your clarity that your 12 step help you find. Lots of peace and love to you. I can't wait to see pictures of you and your bonnet holding your babies! *epic spaz dance*

    ReplyDelete
  6. Love this. Love you. Love DH & Hall & Oates & that you can be THIS pregnant & still be so joyous. You are SO good at counting your blessings. I wanna be more like you when I grow up! Praying all goes smooth & looking so forward to whatever you CHOOSE to share with us from here on out...because we all know you'll need some privacy too. Love ya, Katie! My heart is smilin' for ya!

    ReplyDelete
  7. I am stupid crying over here! Gahhhh!! I am so over the top excited for you all!! :)

    ReplyDelete
  8. If it's any consolation, bottles and sippy cup parts still confuse me. And OOOOOHHHH I AM SO FUCKING EXCITED FOR HALL AND OATES DAY!! (or days, if they decide to take their sweet ass time:)

    ReplyDelete
  9. Dr Brown..wonderful anti-gas bottles, Kaden had serious reflux, worked like a charm, BUT ya need a friggen mechanic to put them together LMAO :)

    ReplyDelete
  10. love, love FREAKING love! CanNOT wait to meet Hall and Oates. Home stretch now mama~ and you are SO very right and despite the fact that these are your 1st (and 2nd) babies~ you already HAVE DOWN what other parents take YEARS to learn. And you are damn friggen skippy that loving them and keeping them safe and in one piece far outweighs the drama OF EVERYTHING ELSE. <3 you Katy~ rock on with your bad ass human growing self!

    ReplyDelete
  11. I'm so unbelievably happy and excited for you. You're going to rock the hell out of this motherhood shit, and even if you completely screw up sometimes (WE ALL DO), they are too little to remember. :D

    I will be thinking about you ALL DAY ON SUNDAY. Have a beautiful labor, my friend...and keep those babies to yourself for as long as you want to. xoxo

    ReplyDelete
  12. Early congrats on Hall and Oates! KISS is a good policy momma and it will serve you both well. I can't believe both babes had hiccups at the same time - already competing for your attention! :) <3

    ReplyDelete
  13. Tears, mama. So happy for you. I am a huge supporter of keeping things simple. Bottles pissed me off, too. Luckily, we only used them once in a while if I was not at home for feeding time. Of course, I do know it will be different with twins, but heck, you may not even have to use those bottles much anyway.
    Love and light to you, doll. xoxo

    ReplyDelete
  14. I am at a loss for words. I can't believe it's almost time!! Gahhh...you have KICKED ASS at this whole growin 2 babies thing. I wuv, wuv, wuv u. And the other 3 of u too. Hall and Oates have no idea how many *strangers* love them...kinda creepy and wonderful all at the same time. SQUEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!! Spazz Dance. Big hugs and love! Cyn
    A.D.D. Music Mamma

    ReplyDelete
  15. I have so much LOVE for you! And Hall and Oates. I find myself every night while on my knees thanking God for another day, you and DH and Hall and Oates pop into my head. I've written you before for giving me a much needed new love for my mom, and now I see a very big similarity between us, I was nuts during my pregnancies with my two minions. Second pregnancy I was driven nuts by doctor putting me on bedrest, telling me that this amazing little boy was going to have some health problems but we couldn't tell what yet, so I freaked of course like every mom would, but pregnancy brain also made it damn near impossible to make sure I prepped over and over again. To my surprise the only thing I didn't do was wash the "doubles" of clothes we had. I'm glad I didn't they stayed in a closet for two years until I realized they were there and BAM I sold them brand new with their tags to a "gently used" baby store and got the kiddo some much needed (Because he was and still is super small for his age) tiny toddler clothes! Keep up the good work, and yes K.I.S.S. is one of the many things I still say in my head daily that my momma passed to me from her years of Experience strength and hope, I still use her One Minute at a time, and her own, Dont run before you can crawl. I love you! You are really a daily inspiration for me. I will keep you and yours in my thoughts and prayers from now till and through Sunday! Much love, kudos, and oh yea what my BFF kept telling me through my labor BREATHE BREATHE BREATHE! Even though I yelled at her in the moment "I AM BREATHING" I later apologized. LOVE YOU Katy You rock!

    ReplyDelete
  16. Ah this internet stuff is wonderful! I don't even know you but I'm so stupid excited and happy for you! Good luck with the whole baby eviction process and congrats and OMG! Twins and I send you good vibes as you begin this whole new journey in your life!

    ReplyDelete
  17. Good luck on Sunday, Katy! :)

    ReplyDelete
  18. You are so awesome.

    ReplyDelete
  19. SO SUPER EXCITED!!! Come on Sunday! I was like you, worked up til the day before I had my daughter. And at the time, in retail - walking the salesfloor ALL DAY - and putting up with CRAZY people! But I was super healthy and super fit because of that - which in turn helped me, after having her, get back to "normal"! We are all so happy and so anxious for you and DH, but we also all know you both got this! Y'all are MORE THAN ready and are going to be superparents (see what I did there?)lol!
    No "good luck", you don't need luck. You have a wonderful, inspiring life and wonderful people around you to help. Prayers to the Gods for the delivery to go as smooth as possible and prayers to the Gods that you recover quickly!!
    We are so ready to meet those two famous babies, but when you & DH are ready.
    Much love and light and gliter! <3

    ReplyDelete
  20. I started reading your blog just before you announced your pregnancy and have loved every. single. friggin. post. Your joy and all around hopeful nature are infectious and I am through the moon excited for you, Katy.

    ReplyDelete
  21. I will be thinking of you and DH on Sunday! Best wishes for a smooth delivery and I can't wait to hear all about Hall & Oates! :-)

    ReplyDelete
  22. Exactly! I wash my kids with johnsons wash and i wash their clothes with regular detergent and they get normal baby bottles and i bought baby clothes off craigslist because they are only going to puke and poop in them anyways! I am so freakin excited for you! We will be going through chicago today travelling back home after the holidays and I will wave haha. I cant wait to meet hall and oates they are gonna be so cute i already know it!

    ReplyDelete
  23. BABIES!!!! I can't wait to see pictures of Hall and Oates! They have an internet full of fans already. lol

    ReplyDelete
  24. I am feeling kind of blerky, so I will say good luck to you now in case I don't get a chance later. I hope everything goes great for you, DH and the babies. Your life will change instantly and dramatically but in about a nanosecond you won't be able to think about your life without them.

    ReplyDelete
  25. You have one of those green and white munchkin baskets! We have one just like it, and even after we got our son off bottles, I still put small plastic spoons and forks in there for the dishwasher (and yes, small cookie cutters to wash a couple of weeks ago . . . a good way to keep them in one place.) I love it.

    And be prepared to go through multiple onesies in one day. My son kept getting them wet a couple of days when he was about about 10 days old. I changed his clothes at least 7 times that day. I wised up that he needed a larger size diaper (no more newborn size) and the pediatrician said that my baby was also quite well endowed . ..

    ReplyDelete
  26. I'm so excited for you! I can't believe its already time for you to meet your babies and I too can't help but to get teary eyed! YAY for Sunday and GOOD LUCK!!!

    ReplyDelete
  27. I love you, you idiot!

    ps: I had to laugh like a crazy loon when I saw your photo and read about the bottle parts ... I was only this morning telling my bff about when we went to BoyGenius' 6 mth checkup and his Doc said "okay, you can stop sterilizing his bottles now." I just looked at him and chuckled ... "I haven't been doing that since he was about 3 weeks old!" Keep it simple is right!

    ReplyDelete
  28. I'm in tears. You are once again so right.
    You will be on my mind and in my heart on Sunday. It will be the best day of your life and I'm so excited for you. All my love to the four of you. Xoxoxo

    ReplyDelete
  29. from one mom of B/G twins to another....take pictures in your brain of anything of importance because you won't remember a thing after dem babies come out. Congrats! They are so worth it! Especially now that they are older and know how to turn on the tv in the morning and let me sleep!

    ReplyDelete
  30. So incredibly excited for you and your hubby!!! Enjoy the next couple of days, and then enjoy even more the days that follow. And if Oates comes out with a mustache, we're going to need a picture of that shit, STAT.

    ReplyDelete
  31. So excited for you. When I was pregnant with my first, I spent hours folding and re-folding all those little clothes. Its going to be grand!

    ReplyDelete
  32. So excited for you. When I was pregnant with my first, I spent hours folding and re-folding all those little clothes. Its going to be grand!

    ReplyDelete
  33. Cannot wait to meet Hall and Oates! Good luck to you and your hubby and know that we're rooting for you here in Manchester, Michigan!!!

    ReplyDelete
  34. I'm ridiculously excited for you and your family! Good luck. I hope all goes smoothly and it is a joyous occasion for all.

    ReplyDelete
  35. Aw hells. I can't even believe it's time. We will miss big old pregnant Katy, but I have a feeling it will be okay when we get to see the little rock stars. If you can remember your parenting motto every minute of every day, parenting will be a breeze for you. Look at you bringing your awesome Spidey common sense into parenting! Big hugs and kisses and forehead flicks and butt pinches to you. Love to you and Dumpster hubs.

    ReplyDelete
  36. Aw hells. I can't even believe it's time. We will miss big old pregnant Katy, but I have a feeling it will be okay when we get to see the little rock stars. If you can remember your parenting motto every minute of every day, parenting will be a breeze for you. Look at you bringing your awesome Spidey common sense into parenting! Big hugs and kisses and forehead flicks and butt pinches to you. Love to you and Dumpster hubs.

    ReplyDelete
  37. Oh Katy! Much love to you Dumpster husband and Hall & Oates! So excited for you and wishing you all the best on eviction day and always! MUCH LOVE! XOXOXOXO

    ReplyDelete
  38. We used the Dr. Brown's bottles, which have like 25 different pieces (really only 4). This sleep deprived momma forgot to use one of the pieces, and all the milk came out through the collar! Lesson learned. Good luck tomorrow, MommaSquared, and remember, "But the child who is born on the Sabbath Day is bonny and blithe and good and gay"!

    ReplyDelete
  39. Good luck to you Katy! Wishing you all the best and a speedy delivery on Sunday!

    ReplyDelete
  40. Wait till you realize you need new bottles because your babies have gas and you need the ones that are crooked to minimize the bubbles, gas, or whatever, or you need the Similac Advanced bottle. Just wait :D

    Nah JK. I hope you don't have to have new bottles. Good luck and many many positive thoughts headed your way for a safe and amazing delivery :)

    ReplyDelete
  41. You know this already, but your an amazing woman. Germs are a GREAT thing. My daughter, eldest of 2, wandered around my moms farm from the very start and I let her get as dirty as she wanted..that child ( now 19) rarely gets sick. Her brother, his dad did more of the caring and is a freak about germs, was overprotected and he gets sick all the time. KISS them to a long healthy life!

    ReplyDelete
  42. Hall and Oates may very well be the LUCKIEST BABIES IN THE WORLD. The WHOLE WORLD. Good luck with delivery day.






    ReplyDelete
  43. Yay for you mama! It's time! You're going to be a fabulous mom, and a fabulous looking mom too. When you do those spaz dances, we'll pretend we don't see that little bit of spitup on your pretty jackets, LOL. Sending good vibes your way...healthy babies and an easy delivery!

    ReplyDelete
  44. Can't wait to see the pics and meet'em. Good luck, congrats, and you're all in our thoughts and prayers!!

    ReplyDelete
  45. favorite part about the dropping on the head. not that that's a good part, just a real part that can happen in life. but please don't drop the babies or bath them in bleach hahaha.

    ReplyDelete
  46. I can't wait to see Hall and Oats! Good luck girl!

    ReplyDelete
  47. No, I am an idiot.

    (Not that I want them to, but if either of your twins has colic or reflux or gas or some other digestive annoyance, those bottles will redeem themselves. Totally worth the engineering degree required for assembly.)

    Sorry for ... you know. My intentions were good.

    ReplyDelete
  48. You probably already know this, but those sack thingies are awful because the baby gets all scrunched up in there and you can't figure out where the handles to them are. The onesies with the footies are the best.

    ReplyDelete
  49. My family is looking at me strangely cause I literally just laughed out loud starting at my computer... LMAO. I did the exact same thing with bottles and I am exclusively breast feeding... lol I am a sister in sobriety and my fried just passed your blog onto me. I am surly adding your blog to my list of reads! Thanks for the lift in spirits!

    ReplyDelete