This one is Dolly Parton, y'all.
Oh sure, she doesn't look like this any more, but does anyone look like they did years ago? She will be the first person to say, hell yeah, I have work done. She never has tried to hide any of it.
It doesn't diminish her importance or her fabulosity. She is still WAY over the top and cheeseball and super excited about everything, and THAT, I relate too.
I have stars in my eyes when I look at her.
She is an underdog. I always root for an underdog. A human or creature who has no right succeeding and making their way in the world. Yes indeed. I am IN.
Of course I look up to this woman.
And talk about grateful - for this? 9 to 5? What working woman DOESN'T feel empowered by this song and movie? This is 30 years old, and I am bopping around to it right now as I write this.
Of course, any woman or proper gay man worth his/her salt,
knows about one of the greatest fucking movies of our time.
This is my status last night:
"You guys know I have obsessions, right? Owls, Sister Wives, Irish Dancers, etc. The ultimate living person obsession may just be Dolly Parton. Here's why I think this, I fantasize about hanging out with her. And I know she loves church. I WOULD EVEN GO TO FUCKING CHURCH WITH HER. Ahem, everyone calm down. It's not gonna happen, but still, that's my dream. To meet Miss Dolly. And maybe even sing gospel songs with her. *runs away and hides*"
I wrote that after being in the shower and singing this song at the top of my lungs, for the 8 millionth time:
I told my husband recently that my vocal range is quite similar to Dolly's in that I can sing along with her in quite good fashion. Meaning if we were to ever karaoke, THIS would be my song. But I haven't karaoke'd since I got sober 10 years ago, and I'm pretty sure nobody wants to see that.
I really don't need to explain the balls this woman has. She came from nothing, and she gives back in a ton of different ways. LOOK AT THAT BROAD. Jesus God in a baby manger. She is divine. I can't say much more than what has been said about her already in many different ways.
Now, one bone to pick. That "I will Always Love You" song of hers, makes me want to blow my fucking brains out. But the rest, even the jesusy songs, I'm cool with. That should tell you something right there.
I revealed around Schmoliday time that I truly believed that Kenny Rogers and Dolly Parton were Mr. and Mrs. Claus for a good long time when I was young, due to the charade they had going for years and I was sucked into the Hard Candy. So in turn, I have a really fucked up view of Kenny Rogers to this day.
I take a lot of shit for loving Dolly so much. And that's fine. I will go mama bear on your ass if you start talking old folks home and all that. I respect my elders.
Especially one who pays so much money to look so cheap.
Now, when we going to see this?