|Eliza Jane Doolittle. Named after the famous character in My Fair Lady and also a song by Vince Gill, "Little Liza Jane".|
Drinking got in our way. Drinking took everything away from us. She didn't ask for it. She couldn't do anything to stop it except for look at me with those big huge eyes as if to question, "why do you keep doing this every single day to us?" I never had kids when I was a drunk, and I can't imagine the anguish moms feel for having put their kids through this devastating life. But I had a glimpse of it with this little soul depending on me for everything and I fucked up. Every day. Over and over again. It didn't mean I didn't love her more than anything in the world. It just meant that drinking took over any logical thinking or feeling. IT TOOK OVER AND BECAME MORE IMPORTANT THAN ANYTHING ELSE.
She was there while I was an active drunk and lost everything, in the end - even her. She waited when I was homeless, and she was living with my parents. She waited when I was in jail. She waited when I got sober and was in a halfway house. She came back to me and has loved me ever since because I can take care of her properly now. Too much to put on a cat? Maybe. But I believe I see all that in her eyes. And she's another reminder of how grateful I am for every gift I have in my life today. A roof over our heads and money to buy us both food is never taken for granted.
|Where she is happiest. On my dear sweet Husband.|
|Sally Boy Kitty on the right. He didn't find me until AFTER I got sober.|